Category Archives: Mindset

Be the spider – Dealing with Failed Projects and Goals

If you are like me, making goals and starting projects in the height of excitement is easy.

Real life picture of me setting goals and sharing the excitement with my buddies – May 2019

Yet, of course, sometimes those goals or projects fail.

If that happens too often it can sap our energy. What is the point in creating a goal if you are not going to achieve it?

I came here for spiders…

Ok, ok.. let’s talk about spiders.

A typical 8 legged arthropod spends a lot of it’s time building cobwebs.

Every now and again, a big storm comes and takes that sticky little trap away.

Or.. one of us walks straight through the middle of it, spitting and cursing as we go.

“What did you do to my cobweb?” – Mr Spider

We don’t think twice about destroying this masterpiece.. and the key to this conundrum is that neither does the spider.

He checks the coast is clear, picks up his tools and goes about creating a brand new one.

When we start a goal or a project, we don’t know what might happen. We can’t predict the future.

If a change in the market makes your exciting new software project redundant, can you let it go?

If you dive into that pizza instead of the gym, can you start again with the same enthusiasm in the morning?

This topic is something I have been working on recently. Too many missed or delayed goals can have an impact.

It is my intention now to let them go, and start again with the same energy and excitement as before.

But.. there are a few things we should watch out for.

Tread carefully with your new goals, like this dog sneaking across an accordion

Don’t Repeat Past Mistakes

What is that saying about insanity… doing the same thing more than once and expecting a different result?

The spider won’t build it’s web across a doorway twice.. and neither should you.

Take a look into your goals and projects before you start them again.

Enjoy the process

I have never (to my knowledge) been a spider, but I suspect it gets some kind of spidery satisfaction from creating that cobweb.

Can you also enjoy the process of your goals and projects, without being too fixed on the result?

Accept Your Fate

The latin phrase “Amor Fati” sums this one up nicely. It is the idea that we can love (or at least accept) our fate, no matter what happens.

Instead of regretting the failure, can you accept it as a necessary lesson? Can you find the positives and focus on them?

Watch Your Energy

If you find yourself low on motivation for your next goal, or you feel like just accepting what you have now “because I will never get XYZ”..

.. then you might still be holding on to something negative.

If that was me, I would write down how I feel about the goal, analyse what went wrong, write what I would do different and forgive myself for any mistakes.

After that, I will make a better plan for how I want to achieve that goal or project.

In Conclusion..

As with most problems I come across, the answer lies in how we perceive it inside ourselves.

It doesn’t matter what other people think of our failure to stick to that diet, to meditate every day this week, to launch our latest product in Q1..

.. because it is our ultimately choice whether this becomes a burden to bear or a step forward, nobody else’s.

Can you turn that failure into a brand new, bigger, better, faster cobweb?

What is success?

Success is not a place you reach and rest in.

Think of it like a garden. It needs regular watering, pruning, shaping and innovating.

Sometimes that money tree, which may have served us well for years, reaches the end of its life. Pull it out, break it down and use it to fertilise your new growth.

It is nice to wander through your garden of success and admire but don’t forget the small things you do every day that make it bloom.

Why being an affiliate is a balancing act

First.. let us start at the beginning.

What is an affiliate?

An affiliate is somebody who recommends you a product and takes a commission (or reward) when you purchase it.

An affiliate is like an online version of a salesman.

Just like a salesman, affiliates are sometimes treated with suspicion and contempt.

Rightly so.

Many affiliates, just like many salesmen, will do everything they can to push a sale. That means being dishonest, being pushy and betraying the trust of their audience.


Some affiliates, just like some salesmen, are extremely successful. They are experts at helping their audience, giving them the right information, engaging them properly and supporting them after purchase.

Don’t get me wrong.. becoming a successful affiliate requires that you know how to be persuasive, how to maximize sales from every customer and know how to turn someone who is vaguely interested into an enthusiastic buyer.

But that doesn’t mean you have to be dishonest and you can still keep two strong principles at heart:

  1. Promote products you believe in
  2. Make sure your customers are happy

What kind of affiliate are you?

What kind of affiliate do you want to be?